28. Gaydar

Maybe you have heard the term.  Gaydar is the subconscious perception suggesting that a particular person is gay or lesbian.  In some people, this ability is very strong.

I didn’t ask for this option from the factory.  My girlfriend Cheryl suggested that my gaydar doesn’t work because I tend to accept people as they are.  I think that when the Almighty was handing out this option, I thought He said radar, and I was waiting for the Doppler upgrade.

I was reminded about this one day when I took my son and daughter out to dinner.  This was pre-transition.  My daughter wanted to stop at a store and pick up some earrings.  One of the clerks at the store was also a classmate.  As we left the store, she turned and said, ‘You know, I think he’s gay.’

We talked for a minute about gaydar and I commented that I don’t seem to have that capability.

“Of course not,” she said.  “You’re a boy!”

I almost choked stifling my laugh.  If only she knew…!

Actually, I think she did, or at least suspected.  However, that is another story that continues in the chapter titled There’s a gorilla in the room.

For whatever reason, I seemed to pop up quite regularly on people’s gaydar, but as an unidentifiable target.  Several people have said that they knew that something was different about me, but they just couldn’t tell what.

To the best of my knowledge, only Ellen pegged me as being transsexual, and that was even before I came out to myself. 

I think the earliest ping that I was … well… different comes from my high school yearbook.  At the time, the yearbook listed prediction about the graduating seniors.  Looking back, the prediction for me is just too funny.